THE MEANDERWALKER

Word has it, Richard Belzer (aka Detective John Munch from TV’s Law & Order, The Beat, and Homocide: Life on the Streets) is set to write two crime novels — and, aside from maybe real law enforcement officers, no one is more qualified, in my opinion.

Not to mention it combines two of my favourite things in the world: Law & Order and Literature. And the very best part is that he, himself, is going to be the character in the book! Richard Belzer! This is the greatest idea ever.

I will pre-order these crime novels from Amazon.

And speaking of writing (sort of)…

Yeah I read the entire transcript from Larry King’s interview with post-jail-Paris Hilton, so what? And aside from her inability to speak in grammatically correct sentences — you know, the simple things like subject-verb agreement — it was coherent and tolerable, and I almost feel bad for her.

Except for I don’t really feel bad for her. Mostly because if I were to go to jail on a DUI charge and for driving with a suspended license, my life would be over, while she gets paid buttloads of money for “her story” and for interviews, and this will probably help her career as a rich person with a lot of inlets for more money. Oh well.

But as part of the interview, she read a bunch of notes and junk that she wrote while she was in jail. What does it say about me that I can relate to this specific excerpt, despite it being juvenile and cliche? Maybe it’s because it sounds just like the kind of stuff I would write in the journals they made us keep in Religion class in middle school and high school? Or maybe I’ve just had my fair share of soul-searching and re-evaluation in my twenties, too?:

“They say when you reach a crossroad or a turning point in life, it really doesn’t matter how we got there, but it’s what we do next after we got there. Usually you arrive there by adversity, and then it is then and only then that we find out who we truly are and what we’re truly made of. It’s a process, a gift and a journey, and if we can travel it alone, although the road may be rough at the beginning, you find an ability to walk it. A way to start fresh again. It’s neither a downfall nor a failure, but a new beginning.”

She also went to Catholic school, though.

I need to write a book.